When you need couples counseling

Most people wait till things are really bad to start couples counseling.

By the time I get the phone call to schedule couples counseling, people can feel hopeless and desperate. Most couples wait too long and sadly that means it can be tougher to get things back on track. There are those relationships where people yell and slam doors and others where they quietly grow apart or grow bored till there is nothing left. The one thing they have in common is the depth of the disruption to people’s lives. It’s hard to be at peace when one of the most important relationships in your life is broken.

Chances are, if you are reading this, you would benefit from couples counseling.

Chances are, most couples would benefit from couples counseling. There is a reason why almost half of the marriages in this country end in divorce. If relationships were easy, we would stay together longer and be happier. I had a single person ask me one time why people say that “marriage is hard?” It’s a great question, but it’s honestly hard to answer succinctly. How would you answer that question?

Why do people fight?

People are complicated, we’re sometimes selfish, we have been wounded and hurt, and ultimately we are just ill-equipped to be good partners. We spend most of our lives training for our jobs, but very little time training to be good partners. If we manage to learn to be good in relationships, it is often by accident. Maybe we had good role models in our lives; maybe we had parents who taught us to communicate or friends who loved us unconditionally. Maybe you were part of a team that taught you how to have conflict and still be friends. If so, count yourself lucky.  But there were surely gaps in your relationship training, and so you and your partner fight. The fights become more and more regular, and the problems never get resolved. If that sounds familiar, consider calling a couples counselor.

You may need couples counseling if…

  • You fight all the time

  • You nitpick each other’s flaws

  • You never seem to resolve problems

  • Sex has become dull or non-existent

  • There has been a physical or emotional affair

  • Trust has been broken

  • You differ about how to spend money

  • You differ about how to raise your children

  • You feel unloved by your partner

  • You have stopped talking to your partner

  • You feel unsafe in your relationship

  • One or both of you are thinking about breaking up

  • You cannot seem to communicate

Some people avoid calling a couples counselor because they think there is a stigma to counseling, or they hope they can resolve things on their own.  I would encourage you to think of your couples counselor more like a trainer or life coach who can help you have the tools you need to resolve problems in your relationship. Think of it more like hiring a trainer to help you get in shape. Couples counselors have specialized training to help you and your partner resolve problems that you have been unable to resolve on your own.

The advice in this blog is not a substitute for professional counseling. 

OTHER THERAPY SERVICES WE OFFER IN HOUSTON, TX

In addition to Family Therapy, Parenting Counseling, Couples Counseling & Marriage Counseling, and Divorce Counseling, we have other mental health services that we offer at our Houston, TX counseling office. Our services are available for adults, children, and teens. We offer Anxiety Treatment, Premarital Counseling, Infertility Counseling, Perinatal and Postpartum Treatment, Parenting Counseling, Child Therapy, and Teen Counseling. As well as School and College Counseling, ADHD Treatment, Autism Therapy, Trauma Therapy, PTSD Treatment, EMDR Therapy, Chronic Pain Therapy and LGBTQ+ Counseling. Our caring therapists also offer Career Counseling, and LPC Supervision. All of these services are also available through Online Counseling throughout Texas.

If you are ready to start making changes in your relationship, please call one of our Houston couples counselors for a free phone consultation to see how we can help you. You can reach us by phone at 713-565-0922 or online at https://www.wilsoncounseling.org/contact-a-therapist.

related posts: